What I See
by Kat J
Summary: Brady/Chloe--A friendship that started in their youth rekindles when Brady comes back a changed man. I disclaim. ;)
1. 1

Hey all, it's been a while but I am back with another fic

this one is another A/U 

I wrote it awhile ago but I wanted to finish the entire thing before I posted, unfortunately I don't think that will happen so I'm posting it now to see if people are actually interested in reading it

this is from Brady's point of view 

enjoy!

  
  


I've been in love since I was five years old to a girl, who is a woman now, whose face I have never seen, but whose voice carried me through my lonely childhood. My story begins not where my life started but where I began to live. I made my first real friend when I was five and a half when most kids worry's centre around baseball and barbies, I was worried about never being normal. Of course I wasn't normal, not to other kids anyway. Being blind and going to a special school is never considered normal on the playgrounds of adolescence. 

I can still remember what the air smelled like when I first met her, (corn-dogs, cotton candy, and sea water in case you were wondering). I remember the wind kept blowing off my baseball cap and little Belle would run to catch it or so I thought, when she let go of my hand and returned shortly to place it back on my head. How was I to know that my younger sister was my protector and ran after the hurtful children that plucked it from my head? 

Later as we grew, I knew Belle watched out for me just as surely as I knew I wasn't like other children. Mom, (who was not my real mother but I pretended she was) told me I was special, sensitive, she said. It took me a while to learn that being sensitive wasn't always the best thing for a little boy to be, especially when sensitive meant you got your feelings hurt so easily by scornful children that just didn't understand.

I'll tell you about the day my life began and it may make you laugh but thinking back it makes me almost cry. 

"Hey you!" 

Belle tugged on my arm and made me walk with her. I guess the wind had gotten the best of my hat and she was tired from chasing. 

"I said hey you! What are you stupid?" I felt my arm being jerked around and it hurt. 

"Me?" I said, shyly. I'd never really been spoken to by another child before. Usually they asked Belle what was wrong with me and even at four she knew how to handle herself. She was always smarter than her age should allow. I rubbed my arm and kept my head down as usual. With my dark glasses on no one would know I couldn't see.

"Yeah you. Here's your hat." The girl said, holding out my small baseball cap. I reached my arm for it and came up short. "It's right here, what the heck is wrong with you?"

"There's nothing wrong with him, you go away and leave us alone." Belle shouted.

"Look kid, I was just giving him back his hat, I saw those creeps take it from him and I thought he might want it back." The girl said annoyed.

"Oh."

"Thanks." I said, grabbing for it eagerly and finally finding it. I'm sure the smile on my face was wide and goofy, but it was amazing, the girl, whoever she was, was actually speaking to me and had gotten back my hat.

"Yeah sure whatever." Chloe Lane told us, picking the scab on her knee. "Why do you let those brats yank your chain for anyway, you're not too wimpy, you should be able to take care of yourself? Doesn't it bother you that your little sister has to protect you?"

The smile fell from my face as I took in the dose of reality. "I didn't know that." I said softly. "I can't see." 

"Well maybe if you took off those dark glasses you'd see better, ever think of that? Here lemme see 'em." Chloe snatched the glasses from my face and looked into my ocean blue eyes; they were unresponsive.

"He's blind." Marlena Evans, my mom, told the little girl as she knelt down, taking the glasses from the small child and returning them back to me. 

"Blind? You're blind?" Chloe asked in disbelief. 

"Yeah." I told her as I shuffled my feet nervously.

"Cool. Wanna go play in the sand?" 

I didn't know what to do, what to say. No one besides Belle had ever asked me if I wanted to play. I couldn't seem to form words.

"Go on Brade." Marlena told me giving me a light nudge in the right direction. 

"That your name? Brade?"

"Brady Victor Black is my name but sometimes people call me Brade." I said proudly. 

"I like that. Come on Brade. I'm Chloe Lane by the way." Then she grabbed my hand and dragged me down the beach.

"I'm sorry. She's so forward sometimes, and it can be really hard to censor her. Takes after her mother, I guess."

"It's alright." Marlena told the redhead as she dabbed at her eyes. "I think that little girl just made my son the happiest he's ever been." Marlena smiled at her new friend.

"We just moved here from New York. I'm Nancy Wesley. Me and my husband and daughter just moved to the neighbourhood."

"In that case we'll have to show you around."

"That would be wonderful."

  
  


"So Brade, what's it like to be blind?"

"I dunno." I shrugged my shoulders. "I can see in my own way. Want me to show you?"

I was pleading to God for her to agree, I wanted so badly to see her as much as I could see another person. 

"Yeah sure." 

I reached out my tiny hand and made contact with her soft skin. I ran my fingers over her face and noted the small button-like child's nose that was similar to my own. I touched her lips and her chin and I got a clear picture of how she must look inside my brain. "You're very pretty." I told her shyly.

"That's what my mom says. I hate when she says that." Chloe announced. 

I felt absolutely defeated, there I was baring my soul and she shut me down. "Oh." I said.

And she must have noticed the sadness in my voice or in my features because the next thing she said was. "But from you I like to hear it."

"What's it like to see?" I asked.

"I dunno. It's like having a rainbow in front of you all the time. I think we need more sand." Chloe informed me and bulldozed more of the gritty but soft stuff over my legs. 

And that was it. The issue of me being blind was left right there in the sand. And that's how it began. Chloe never cared that I was blind and I don't ever think she really knew how that made me feel. Now I sit on a plane nearly eighteen years later, readjusting my thin frames as I look out the window. That's right. I said look. Dad always wanted the best for me and when we finally found a doctor that would perform the risky surgery that would give me sight. We didn't hesitate. 

Chloe and I lost touch when we moved to the best blind oriented facilities the world had to offer. But I'm determined to make this trip worthwhile. I'm determined to let Chloe Lane know I loved her - love her still for that matter.


	2. 2

Hey everyone, I just wanted to say thank you for embracing this story. Your comments have meant a lot and I am overwhelmed by the response.

Sorry for any mistakes that might appear. :( I do try to edit the chapters before I post but sometimes things just slip through. Not to mention that my grammar is not the best. LOL

I will try to update as often as I can. I hope you all like this chapter.

  
  
  
  


The day I met Chloe changed my life. The plane starts its decent and I feel Salem in my bones. I feel Chloe is near and my stomach turns with nerves. I've always been the type of guy who is less than confident and Chloe was always my biggest fan. I've missed that in our years apart. Her encouragement, her smiling face, the way she never let me give up. 

  
  


In our teenage years the once tomboyish Chloe became popular. Her small stalky frame turned into a voluptuous female figure. But she was still that same girl. She never forgot the boys that taunted me in my childhood and still didn't give them the time of day and I loved her even more for that.

  
  


At thirteen I was even more awkward than most. My tall lanky frame and my clumsy demeanor, not to mention my blindness, did nothing to attract other girls and I think that even if it had, I wouldn't have wanted anyone but Chloe.

  
  


She was perfect to me. She was smart and funny. Wittier than anyone I knew and as sarcastic as the devil. Her sharp tongue often got her in trouble in school, but her brilliance and soft voice got her out of it most of the time. 

  
  


We were polar opposites. I, the shy boy, goofy and unsure of himself and she the charismatic girl, poetic and confident, but somehow we matched each other. It was a friendship that I so desperately clung to and the only real one I ever had.

  
  


What made me fall in love with her? I don't think there was just one thing. I think the love was there even the first day we met. 

  
  


* * *

I want this to go as I planned. I'll show up at her house one day soon and tell her I love her. In my dreams she'll tell me she loves me back and we'll kiss. I'll take her in my arms like I've longed to do and lay her down and we'll make love. 

But see, here's the thing about girls and love and - lovemaking. The guy they want has to be the best. He has to be the most romantic, sensitive, and down right best lover they've ever had and will ever have again. They expect to be ruined for other men by their one true love. I know this because I have a sister. And as every guy that has a sister knows, girls read romance novels, and fantasize about their perfect love life, not all girls, but a lot. I wasn't going to take any chances, because even though Chloe had always been a tomboy she was still a girl. A beautiful, intelligent girl, with a sexuality to her that I was sure was untamable. I wanted to be the one to ruin her for other men. But therein lies the problem. How can I be this stallion when I've never even had sex, let alone made love? (Unless masturbating in the shower counts, which I'm pretty sure doesn't!). 

God, Chloe was the first girl I ever even kissed and that was only because she felt sorry for me. At least that's why I think she kissed me. I was a blind kid, who the hell else was going to kiss me?

I wonder if she knew how much I cherished that kiss. Her threat to beat me up after if I told didn't lessen the impact either. Hell, I know I said she was the first girl I ever kissed but what I really meant was that she was the only. 

It happened twice, once like I said, behind the bleachers at her baseball game when we were twelve. After they had lost and all the other guys on her team went for burgers, she took me by the hand and pushed me into the dirt and then laid it on me. Now, being blind makes me very aware of the things around me and let me tell you the feel of her lips on mine was mind numbing. I couldn't talk afterwards and when she sat up and asked me a question, I didn't hear it until the third time. "Yeah, I could go for some pizza." I answered in that shy voice I always used when I was embarrassed which ironically was more times than not.

The second time it was after a school dance. Of course I hadn't gone but she had, with Bobby Stanton or was it Billy Stevenson? It doesn't really matter, there were lots of boys she went out with that I care not to remember. Anyway, it was after the dance and she came over like she always did, and I think it was to comfort me, and sometimes I needed her comfort, but I always acted macho and nonchalant (keep in mind this girl could read me like a book). She turned to me and I asked her a question as I always did after one of her dates. "Did you kiss him?" And she shrugged it off like she usually did, trying to change the subject and so I knew that was a yes. 

"Brade, will you dance with me?" She asked me out of the blue.

"I can't dance." I told her and I felt my cheeks grow hot. "Do you forget that I'm blind?" I asked her, almost angrily, and it was so unlike me to be angry and she knew it.

"Yes Brady, sometimes I do." She told me, and I could feel my eyes moisten. "Now dance with me, you idiot!" She commanded. And I was on my feet and swaying. She guided me across the room like a leaf in fall, dipping and whirling before we finally hit the ground. The loud thump surprisingly didn't wake anyone in the house and when I was still on the ground, disoriented from the fall, she took my hand and placed it against her cheek. I ran my fingers over her soft skin and my breath seemed to be lost. The next thing I knew her lips were on mine and this wasn't some juvenal kiss. This was expert, because by then Chloe was an expert and my lips were so immature compared to hers, but somehow we found a rhythm and I nearly died right there. And when it was over and my lungs were burning for air she helped me up and took my hand in hers. "Don't ever think you can't do anything just because you can't see." She warned me. "You see better than most people, and one day you'll realize that."

And with that she was out the door. I don't ever think that Chloe knew exactly what she did for me.

  
  



	3. 3

  
  


I know this chapter is really short but I promise there will be broe in the next chapter. ;) be patient with me please. LOL

  
  
  
  


I search for my luggage when I'm finally pulled from my thoughts and head out to hail a cab. My eyesight is not the greatest and so I still can't drive a car (I've never even tried for that matter), but I can see and it's enough for me. I tell the driver my destination and we're off to the old loft where my family used to live. Dad gave me the keys and told me I could live there if I liked or I could stay there for a while until I found a place of my own. I decided I would stay. I liked the loft and it reminded me of so many good times. 

After I unpack my bags I'm exhausted and I'm barely out of my suit jacket before I fall asleep on the couch. 

  
  


When I wake up, it is dark and I know it is late. A funny thing about the dark is that I can navigate my way through it better than I can in daylight sometimes. I open the fridge which has been stocked full

and take out a coke. I let the sweet syrup invade my senses and it feels good to be home.

  
  


I make plans to visit the new blind facility that Basic Black has sponsored and appointed me to run. I know in my heart that I will love working there and helping other children who are as isolated as I was as a youth. 

I can't help but wonder if I will be able to see Chloe tomorrow and I smile at the mere thought of seeing her. 

I find myself yawning again and I make it up to my old bedroom, where a larger bed than the one I had as a child, sits in the centre of the room. I pull my tie from my collar and unbutton my shirt and slacks, sinking into the cool sheets wearing only my boxers. I close my eyes and instantly I'm asleep.

  
  
  
  


I wake up the next morning and I feel revitalized. The shower is nice and I let my hair air dry because I'm already late for the meeting I scheduled. By the time I get there the meeting has started without me and I have to excuse myself as I find a seat.

"As I was saying," Dr. Pete Wilson says as he faces the twenty member staff, "this is one of the best facilities, built to include the most modern technology and I expect you all to work hard to ensure that our patients receive the best care. Mr. Black will be heading up our team of counsellors, if you have any problems I suggest you see him. I will now appoint the floor to Mr. Black, unless anyone has any questions." No one did.

I stand and I face the crowd, I feel my cheeks get hot and I'm hating this. I'm not good at public speaking and I want to get it over with as soon as possible. "Thanks Pete. First I want to welcome you all. I'm very glad to have you all here. I just wanted to say a few words and then anyone who wishes may speak. As some of you know, just a few years ago my father brought me to a place similar to this and I was one of the lucky ones because my family had money and so I stand before you today a person who can now see. But it wasn't too long ago that I was in the same shoes as the people that will be visiting this place. What I ask of you, is for you to have compassion and understanding. Some of these children will be angry and some will be painfully shy and those are the kids we need to work on. Besides offering medical services, this facility was designed to counsel blind children and parents of blind children. I expect professionalism, but I also expect warmth. I want people to leave this place feeling better about themselves, not ashamed because they cannot do things. It is our job to try to counsel these kids and if we cannot help them to see, show them that they posses many other gifts. I guess I just want you to make these kids feel good and normal. That's all I really have to say." I finish and I sit down and I can't believe the tangent I just went on. I survey the room and people smile at me, I smile back and I feel good. I know this is going to be a great place and I feel like I can make a difference. 

  
  


The meeting is adjured and we break for lunch. There is still a lot to do before the centre can be opened. 

I decide to walk around Salem place and see the things I desperately wanted to as a child. I feel nervous because I know I can't avoid confronting Chloe forever. I want to see her and soon, but I'm afraid once I do, I'll just blurt out I love her and freak her out. I want to tell her when the time is right, I want to tell her after I make her fall for me. 


	4. 4

  
  


It's nearly six in the evening by the time I finish my work at the blind school. I grab my coat from the back of my chair and throw it over my shoulder. I readjust my tie so that it is tight to my neck and I walk out, locking the door behind me. I know where my destination is but I realize I'm not exactly sure how to get there. I know the Wesley's address and so I tell the cabby and sit back in nervous anticipation. 

By the time I get there it is quarter after six and I hesitate before I knock because I can smell the savoury essence of one of Mrs. Wesley's famous roast beef dinners. My stomach growls and I make up my mind and ring the bell twice. I can hear Nancy's cheery voice even before she makes it to the door and I laugh softly. 

The door opens and the look of shock on her face makes me smile and then she swallows me up in her embrace and it is as if I never went away. "Brady Black," she says to herself and even though I can't see her face, I know there must be a stream of tears. She pulls back and I'm right. 

"Mrs. Wesley," I say formerly. "I'm so glad to see you again." I take in her fiery red hair and plump features and realize she's exactly what I pictured and she's more wonderful than I could have imagined. 

She looks up at me and notices my glasses and she puts her hand to her face. " You're wearing glasses Brady does this mean....You can see!?" It was more of a statement, but I nod my head yes nonetheless. "Craig! Craig, get in here! Look who's here." She yells over her shoulder and in a second Mr. Wesley is coming through the swinging doors with his napkin still tucked into his collar. His smile grows when he sees me and I stick out my hand for him to shake but he pulls me into a hug instead. 

"My god," he says, stepping back in fascination. "It has been a long time Brady."

"Yes, it has." I can feel my trademark redness come to my face as they both examine me. I readjust my glasses in my nervousness and shuffle around. "Does Chloe still live here?" I ask and hope I left the desperation out of my voice. 

"Sure she does." Craig says smiling and he and Nancy exchange a look, like they are privy to some secret. "She should be home any time now." Nancy pipes up. "You must be hungry, come and have dinner with Craig and I."

"Oh no, that's okay."

"Brady, you know my wife will take it as an insult if you don't stay, besides we have plenty and we can catch up while we eat." 

I nod my head and follow them into the dinning room. We are just starting in on dessert when the front door slams shut and Chloe comes rushing into the room. This is it, my big reintroduction. The only problem is Chloe doesn't even seem to notice me as I stand like a true gentleman, she just continues to rant to her mother.

"Do you believe him?" Chloe squeals. Her hair is long and I bet it is just as soft as I remember it. Her eyes grow large as she raises her voice and I can't believe the girl I have yearned for every day since I was five is standing in front of me. I want to speak up but I hold my tongue and continue to watch her completely fascinated. When I couldn't physically see people, I had my own idea of what was beautiful. Chloe was beautiful in my eyes for all the qualities she possessed and she was beautiful now in society's eyes, but no one would know her true worth better than me. Even if people had been lucky enough to know her, they would never understand her true gifts that went beyond the makeup and the nice rack. As I look at Chloe with her cheeks flushed and her eyes narrowed, I can't help but think how sexy she looks.

"What did he do now?" Mrs. Wesley inquires in a tone that was one notch up from boredom, apparently she was quite accustomed to these little outbursts.

"We were at Tuscany when this woman walked by and do you know what he had the audacity to say?" Chloe asked fuming.

"Chloe Lane!" Craig's voice soothed softly. "Why you let Philip Kiriakis make you feel inadequate blows my mind, now stop being so rude and say hello to our guest. I believe you know him already."

Chloe's eyes shifted and she finally notices me, I stand up even straighter and give her a polite smile even though it feels like the butterflies in my stomach are playing a game to see which one could make me throw up first. 

Her eyes scan me and slowly a smile spreads over her face. "Brady!?" She asks softly and I can see the tears collect in her eyes. I nodded my head because I know my voice would deceive me. "My god." She whispers and walks over to me so she is in front of me. "You really did it. You can really see." 

I nod again and feel my throat get dry. It is the first time I have seen her. I refused to look at pictures, videos, anything that would rob me of this moment. Very gently I feel her hand come to my face and I can die now because she is looking into my eyes and then pulls me into a hug.

"We'll let you two get caught up." Craig says and ushers Nancy into the living room with him. 

"It been a long time." Chloe says quietly as she sits down on one of the dinning room chairs. 

I smile and sit down beside her, grabbing my napkin and nervously twisting it in my hands. 

"Why are you here?"

My face falls and I think maybe she isn't that happy to see me after all.

"I came to run Basic Black's latest venture. Dad is building a state of the art blind facility. I didn't know if you'd want to see me." I tell her softly.

"Brady, of course I do."

"You're not still mad?"

"That you didn't even say goodbye when you left and I had to hear it from Belle in a letter that you were never coming back?" She asks and I can tell by her tone she's still hurt. "No, I'm over that." She says totally sarcastically.

"I'm sorry." I say and it's barely over a whisper. "I just couldn't say goodbye." I'm on the verge of begging for her forgiveness but when she smiles and hits my shoulder, I know things are okay. 

"Guess what? You'll never believe this." She laughs and it's contagious. 

"What?" I ask.

"I'm engaged to your uncle, how weird is that?" Suddenly my enthusiasm wavers and I don't think it's such great news, in fact I'm utterly shocked.

"You're what?"

"I know what your thinking but he really is a great guy, once you get past his arrogance." She smiles and I'm still sitting in stunned silence. "That was a joke." She says and I just look at her. 

"Congratulations." I murmur and take a sip of the cold coffee in front of me as a distraction.

Why Philip? I could handle any other guy being engaged to Chloe but not Philip. This was a guy who thought I was stupid and always talked to me as if I were a child. He used to talk real loud in front of me as if I was deaf too. I'll never understand a guy like him and I'll never understand Chloe for wanting to marry someone so superficial.

Philip had been one of the biggest jerks to me in our childhood and now Chloe was engaged to the guy, I couldn't help but feel betrayed. 

"You don't seem too happy for me?" She says softly and I can tell I've hurt her feelings. 

"I am. I'm just confused. I thought you always said that Philip was a rich snob and you wanted nothing to do with him?" I tell her bluntly.

"I did. But when you went away he was so great to me. I guess we just fell in love." She says it so casual, I wonder if she even believes herself. There goes my expert plan to make her fall in love with me. I sigh. "It's getting late. I better go. I've got a long day ahead of me."

"So soon?" She asks and I wish I could stay forever, but I can't forget the hurt I'm feeling and need time to think it over.

"I'm afraid so. I still have to go over a bunch of paperwork tonight. We're opening the blind centre in less than a week and we're still so behind."

"Oh, well maybe we could have dinner sometime." She suggests and I give her a curt nod.

She walks me to the door, Nancy and Craig have already gone to bed and so I tell her to say I said goodnight.

"I will. I'll see you soon." She pulls me into a hug and I wrap my arms around her. I don't want to let go but I can't hold her forever, especially now that I know there will never be a chance for us.

  
  



	5. 5

I'm just having one of those days where I can't stop thinking about Chloe and it's frustrating the hell out of me. I can't concentrate on anything, even though the mound of paper work on my desk is very unsettling and my tie seems to be cutting off my air supply, I still only think of her. I stand up and pull the tie from my collar and throw it down on the floor. I look out the large glass window and dammit everything reminds me of her.

  
  


It's been a week since we've opened the blind facilities to the public and there is such a great response, we barely have enough staff to keep up with demands. I'm swamped with paperwork and worse yet have been too busy to see Chloe.

  
  


I walk into the blind facility with every intention of going straight to my office, but when I come through the door a small figure catches my eye. I approached the small boy with caution. He turned to face me as I put a hand on his shoulder. It was obvious he was a patient as I looked into his blank dark brown eyes. "Hey buddy," I say. "What'cha doing?" I kneel beside him. 

He shrugs his shoulders and my heart goes out to him. I see myself years back, so lonely and confused, feeling like I would never fit in and most of the time I didn't. 

"Justin!?" A short, dark haired woman calls frantically.

"Right here mommy." He answers weakly and in a second is swallowed up in his mothers arms. 

"Don't ever do that again! Why did you do that?"

"I don't want anymore tests." He tells her innocently. As if suddenly noticing my presence the woman puts Justin back on the ground. 

"Hi, I'm Brady Black." I offer and hold out my hand.

She looks back at me and takes my hand in hers. "Molly Henderson and this is my son, Justin." 

"It's nice to meet you. Do you have an appointment with Dr. Wilson?" 

"Yes, just a consultation. I know Justin hates this." She tells me and looks over her shoulder where Justin has wandered, feeling his way around. "He's just so...so distant." She explains and I can see the pain and fear for her son in her eyes. 

"I understand, I've been there. Maybe you should talk to one of our counsellors." I suggest.

"He wasn't always like this. Since his father...there was a fire and he didn't make it. They were so close and now that he doesn't have him, he's just so alone." There are tears in her eyes and I feel my chest tighten.

I nod my head and look past her at the tiny child. "We'll do everything we can. I want you to stay here a few days, I'll put you up at the Salem Inn."

"Oh no, we couldn't possibly."

"Please. I insist. I'll make the arrangements."

"Thank you." She tells me humbly. 

  
  


After work I go to the Brady pub and after everyone has fawned over me for half an hour, I'm finally left by myself. I take a bite of my cheeseburger and nearly choke when Philip and Chloe walk in hand in hand. Chloe immediately spots me and rushes over. 

"Brady!" She squeals and sits down across from me. Philip follows and sees me and seems less than enthusiastic as he sits down beside Chloe. "You don't mind if we sit with Brady do you?"

Philip grumbles and rather loudly says. "No, it's okay with you Brady isn't it?" 

I nod my head. "No it's fine Philip and you don't need to shout." 

Chloe finds this funny but when Philip glares at her, she is quiet.

Philip calls over the waiter and orders himself a plate of fries and a hamburger, and orders Chloe a salad. 

We're eating and there is virtual silence for the entire meal. I can't look in their direction and I realize I lost my appetite the moment they walked in together. I more or less shuffle the fries on my plate and sip my milkshake until Philip stands to pay their bill.

"I'll be back in a minute." Philip tells us and I don't care if he ever comes back. In fact, I hope he slips and knocks himself unconscious. 

"You've been busy." Chloe tells me evenly.

"Yeah, I have a lot of work to do." 

"Did your secretary tell you I've called a few times this week?" She asks and looks up from her untouched food. 

"Yeah, I was just too busy, I meant to get back to you, I really did, but things just kept coming up." It's the truth more or less. I know I can't tell her that I can't stand to see her because it only makes me think of what I've already lost. I'd come back for her and she wasn't going to be with me and the honest truth was it hurt.

"I get it. Maybe we could just hang out one night next week. Philip's going away on business and I just get so bored sitting home all alone."

I smile and it's the first real smile I've given all evening. "I think that can be arranged." We exchange a pleasant smile and then she gets up and is by Philip's side. 

I leave money on the table, grab my suit jacket from the back of the chair and then leave. 

When I get home, I'm suddenly looking forward to next week.

_________


	6. 6

  
  


I've been working with some of the children and Justin still stands out to me. He seems so vulnerable. At first he wouldn't talk and was prone to wandering off but he's been getting better. 

It's just past noon when someone knocks on my door. 

Chloe walks through my office doors and I put the phone down giving her my full attention. "Chloe! What are you doing here?" 

"I brought you lunch." She tells me smiling. "I know you're busy and knowing you, you wouldn't stop to eat unless someone forced you to. So I guess that's what I'm doing."

"Thanks. Let's go out on one of the benches outside." I suggest and she follows my lead.

I am surprised to find Justin sitting outside under a tree by himself. "I'll be right back." I tell Chloe while she is busy setting up our lunch. Hustling over to Justin I sit down beside him and lean my back against the tree. "Hey Justin, what do you got there?"

"A book." He tells me shyly. I can't help but smile because it's taken a long time to get him to say two words to anyone but his mother and even then he didn't say much to her. 

"Oh yeah. How long have you been reading brail?" I ask because frankly it took me a long time to learn it myself and here was this child who was barely six and functioning well above average.

"A while. Daddy taught me." He says softly.

"You must miss him a lot."

"Mommy says he's with the angels."

"Well your mommy is right and you wanna know something?"

"What?"

"My mommy is with the angels too."

This seems to catch his interest. "Really?"

"When I was a baby, my mom got very sick. She had cancer and couldn't take the medicine to keep her alive because she wanted to save me."

"Daddy saved me too." He says very quietly. "He's never coming back is he?"

"No Justin, he's not." 

He takes a deep breath and closes his book digesting this information.

I look over at Chloe and as much as I want to be alone with her I decide Justin needs some friends right about now. "Hey buddy, what'dya say you have lunch with me and a very good friend of mine." 

He's quiet for a while and then finally nods his head. We stand and his little hand reaches out for mine and I smile as I wave to Chloe. 

Chloe has quite the spread on the table and when she sees us approaching, she kneels down and talks softly to Justin. "Hey sweetie, aren't you so cute!?" 

Justin tugs on my hand and sort of leans against my leg, his face is red and I think how very much he reminds me of myself. I mouth to Chloe that he's a little shy and she smiles in return. "That's a nice book you have there." She tries gently. "I wish we had someone to help us eat all this food. Hey, do you know any little boys who like chocolate cupcakes?"

"I like chocolate cupcakes." He volunteers. 

"Oh you do?"

He nods and I help him onto the bench, sitting beside him while Chloe sits across from us. "Justin, this is Chloe Lane, my very best friend." Justin seems to process the information and then smiles. "Can I have a cupcake?" He asks and Chloe hands him one with lots of frosting. "Thank you." 

"Can I have one?" I ask and pout out my bottom lip. 

"Not until you've had your lunch." She laughs and hands me a sandwich. I take a large bite and don't realize how hungry I was. 

After I've finished my third sandwich I barely have room for my cupcake but I manage to eat it nonetheless. 

"Good thing I remembered how much you enjoy food." Chloe laughs. Coming to sit beside the small boy who surprisingly had opened up quite a bit in the last half an hour, it seems that Chloe has made quite the impression on him. I watch as Chloe takes a napkin from her bag and gently begins to wipe the extra frosting from his face. "There!" She says when she's done and he is squeaky clean. 

"Oh Justin. I told you to stop running off like that! I'm sorry." Molly apologizes and takes his hand.

"It's alright, we really enjoyed his company." Chloe says and smiles warmly. "He's quite the little gentleman."

Molly is taken aback and looks down at her small son. "He takes after his father." She says and both Chloe and I can see the tears spring to her eyes. 

"I really like it here." Justin tells us all and we all share a laugh.

"I really think this place is performing miracles." She smiles and ushers Justin inside.

"That was nice of you." I tell Chloe. 

"It was the truth. He is a little gentleman, a little messy, but still a charmer. Not unlike someone else I know." She laughs taking another napkin and wiping my own face. I reach for the napkin and take her hand in mine. 

"Why are you really marrying Philip?" I ask and it catches her off guard. 

"Because..because I love him."

"Are you sure?"

"Brady, stop it!" 

"Stop what?" I question and I know very well I am hitting close to home and maybe Chloe doesn't want to face reality, but I need an answer. 

"I can't talk about this. I'm going to marry Philip and I don't care what Nancy or Craig or even what you have to say about it Brady Black!" She's angry now and her brows are furrowed and I know that I shouldn't push her but I can't help myself.

"You don't want to listen to the people who are the closest to you because you know we're right. You won't be happy with Philip, you're not happy now!"

"How dare you! What would you know about me or my life? You left Brady. You left me here with Philip to pick up the pieces. I shared everything with you, we did everything together, and you just left. Do you know how much that hurt?"

"Probably as much as it hurt to leave you." I say softly and I'm hating myself because I can see the tears collecting in her eyes. "I didn't mean to hurt you, but it was important to me. Look at me Chloe, I can see, isn't that worth something?"

"That never mattered to me and you know it."

"I know it didn't, but it mattered to me. How was I going to go through life without seeing your beautiful face?" I ask softly and she looks up.

"I'm not beautiful." She says and the sad thing is, she believes it's the truth.

I cup her chin and caress her cheek with my thumb. "You are."

Her face flushes and she turns from me, straightening out her clothes. Standing, she packs. "I'll call you." 

I stand and turn her around, wrapping my arms around her. I hug her tightly and she responds by wrapping her arms around me and burying her head in my chest. "I'm here for you." I tell her with a gentleness to my voice that I hope she recognizes. I let her go and walk back to my office, turning to see her sit back down on the bench lost in thought. I wonder to myself how long it's been since someone other than her parents has shown her affection? Certainly Philip would know how much she needed to be hugged and reassured. Wouldn't he?


	7. 7

  
  


Chloe does call and I suggest a picnic on the weekend. She agrees but we have to wait until noon to go because Philip's plane doesn't leave until after eleven. I agree of course because I have a weakness for her and will bend to her needs. I tell her to meet me at Salem park when she can get away.

  
  
  
  


"What is all this Brady?" She asks when she catches a glimpse of the picnic I've set up.

"Shakespeare in the park." I tell her with a wide grin. She smiles and that smile turned into a light laugh as she remembers. "I told you one day, I would be the one reading to you."

"That you did Brady, that you did." 

I get her to sit down and I pull out a warn out copy of Shakespearean sonnets and plays. The wind blows through her hair and I nearly sigh as it cascades around her shoulders, but I hold it back as I have for the hundredth time since I've been back in town. I know she's engaged, I keep reminding myself, but somehow it evades my brain every time I look at her.

"Do you remember how you used to read to me, all those great books that we couldn't get in brail?"

"I remember." She tells me and smiles fondly at the memory. "You loved when I read to you, and I don't think I ever told you, but I loved it too." 

I blush as usual. "I didn't know that."

"You weren't like other boys Brade." She says softly, and my heart flutters with the way she uses my old nickname as if no time has passed. "You were always so smart, so different, and it had nothing to do with the fact that you were blind." She looks me in the eye when she says this and I know she is wondering how I will take it.

"You were always there for me." I tell her and I can barely make my voice go above a whisper. "I never thanked you for everything you always did for me."

"You don't have to, I wanted to do those things. You and me had some of the best times of my childhood." She says these things and seems sad, which makes me sad because I think that we did those things a lifetime ago and it's too hard to go back. "Do you remember how we used to play cops and robbers?"

"Like it was yesterday."

  
  


***************

  
  
  
  


Chloe and I sit under our poorly made tent in the middle of my room, defending ourselves from the cops. We were the rebel outlaws and had just pulled off a large heist. The large refrigerator box and cotton sheets we've made into a fort is our hide-out. 

"We'll be safe in here." I tell Chloe in my deep tough voice. 

"That was close." She sighs. "Let's count our lute." Chloe suggested and dumped the pillow case full of our goods out on the floor between us. I didn't really know what we had gotten, but I knew by the jingling of one of the items, we had at least one set of keys. I'd never played games like this up until now, I always thought I was too limited. But with Chloe to guide me around my house as we prowled and stole whatever we could find, I changed my mind. I had changed my mind about a lot of things since I had known Chloe. She never treated me like I couldn't do anything. 

"We'll hide out here until midnight and then we'll hitchhike to the airport." I say enthusiastically, really getting into the game.

"Should we go to Paris or Rome?" Chloe asked, unwrapping a snack cake and splitting it in half. "Here's your share." She says handing me the treat.

"Thanks." I take a large bit and mull her question over in my mind. "We might have to go to both." I reason. "The cops will be after us, so we'll have to keep moving."

"You're right!" She cries excitedly. 

"We'll rob and steal all over the world and then when we have enough money I'll find a doctor and he'll cure me." I tell her enthusiastically. 

"Can they really do that?" Chloe asks.

My heart is beating wildly and I want so desperately for it to be true.

"Brady?" I wasn't aware my father had been leaning against my doorframe until he called my name. 

"Yeah dad?" I ask, hoping he hadn't heard what Chloe and I had been talking about.

"Come out here, please." He saya sternly and I knew I was in some sort of trouble. I felt my way out of the box and stood up straight. 

"Relax buddy, you're not in trouble." He laughed and touched my shoulder. I relaxed a little. "You wouldn't happen to know where my keys have gotten to you, would you?"

"N-no." I drawl.

"Are you sure you and Chloe didn't accidentally take them?" 

"I don't know." I shrugged.

"Brady, I'm going to be late for a very important meeting if I don't find those keys." 

I hear the rattling of the keys from inside our hide out. "Chloe?" I ask and she hands them out to me without leaving the tent. 

"I'm sorry Mr. Black, but see we really didn't take them."

"We didn't?" I ask surprised.

"No, we rescued them from pirates who were going to sell them and use the money for earings and jewels, so you should be thanking us!" Chloe told my father coming out of the tent, looking as innocent as ever, I'm sure.

"Is that right?"

"Yes!" We told him in unison. 

"Well then keep up the good work!" He laughs and picks us both up in his strong arms. He kisses my cheek and then sets us down. 

Chloe waited until the door closed and my father was out of the house before she spoke again. "Sucker!" She yelled and we broke down in fit of giggles.

**********

  
  
  
  


I shake my head, coming out of my memories of a time when we were both so happy. Now I look at Chloe and she seems haunted. "Philip takes care of you, doesn't he?" I ask and even I'm shocked at how forward it seems. 

"He does."

"He's good to you? Treats you right and all of that?"

"Brady why are you asking?"

"It just seems... it seems that you're too good for him. He doesn't deserve you. And I don't think he realizes how special you are." Even as I say these things and even though I know Chloe will be angry I can't seem to shut my mouth."I honestly didn't think you would still be living in Salem. I thought maybe you would be in New York waiting for your premiere at the Met. Your mother told me you don't sing anymore. Why not?"

"When were you talking to my mom?" She asks and I know she's trying to get out of answering.

"I saw her at Salem place. Now stop avoiding my question and tell me why you gave up singing."

"It's not that I gave it up, I just put it on hold." She says and tangles her fingers in her hair. I can't help but think she looks nervous and I wonder if it has anything to do with Philip. 

"On hold for what?"

"I'm going to be married soon, Philip wanted me to concentrate on that and not worry about other things."

"Chloe, I really can't believe you're the same girl that punched Jeremy Collins in the fifth grade for making fun of opera. Why are you letting Philip run your life? I know you Chloe. I know the Met was your dream. I always thought you would get there one day."

"So did I." She says quietly to herself and looks up embarrassed. 

I decide to change the subject because I see that Chloe is going to shut me out if I keep it up and that is the last thing I want her to do. 

  
  


I realize she probably has had no one to really talk to since I've been gone and I've already seen the damage talking to Philip has caused her. "I was wondering something."

"What's that?" She asks and breathes a sigh because she knows that I'm trying to lighten the mood.

"You seem to have a real way with kids. Justin adores you and I know the other kids will too."

"What other kids? Brady, what are you trying to say?" She asks. " Just spit it out." She finally says when all I do is smile.

"See the thing is, Justin's mother has to go back to Canada, she's used up all her vacation time and they need the money. I tried to convince her that I would pay for them to stay on, but she wouldn't hear of it. She's a very proud woman, but she would agree to letting Justin stay here for a while. She knows how much progress he's made and what he still could accomplish. Surgery won't help him see, there's too much risk in his case, but there is more we can do to help him deal with being blind." I realize I've been rambling so I get to the point. "Anyway, I've found someone who's willing to take him in for a while, but we desperately need volunteers at the blind facility and I was just thinking..."

"That I might want to volunteer?" 

"Something like that." I smile shyly. "Is it too much too ask though? Am I being rude? I just think you'll be great for these kids." My face is no doubt red by now, but it's the truth. "If it helps make your decision, your mothers already agreed to help out three days a week."

"She did? Well of course she would, she loves kids." Chloe laughs rolling her eyes. "Of course I'll help Brady, as much as I can."


	8. 8

  
  


I look in the mirror, I'm not the scrawny kid I once was. Working out and lifting weights was all I could do when we moved away not to think of Chloe. It seems these days all I do is think of her. I remember her tough New York attitude and jargon that have faded over the years and I laugh.  
  


****************

We stand in Chloe's kitchen eating some fresh cookies baked by none other than Nancy Wesley. 

"Do you want another glass of milk?" Mrs. Wesley asks me as she ruffled her fingers through my hair.

"Yes please." I smiled and feel my face go red. Nancy always had a soft spot for me and it drove Chloe nuts. She was always fawning over us and Chloe could easily get annoyed with her mother.

"You're too polite." She whispers to me, when Nancy finally leaves us alone.

"What's wrong with that?" I ask hurt.

"Nothing, I guess." She tells me in that voice that meant there was more she wanted to say.

"No, tell me!" I demand.

"Well, you're always so nice and always saying please and thank you, it's just babyish."

"I can't help it." I tell her sadly.

"See that's it, right there, even when I'm being mean to you, you don't get mad. You never yell. You don't disagree with your parents. I've never even heard you curse." She sighs as if it is the worse crime in the world.

"I don't like to cause trouble." I say honestly.

"But sometimes you should. Think of it this way, your parents are probably bored to death. You're like the model child and they have nothing to do. You have to give 'em a reason to scream at you every once in a while otherwise they feel like they're useless. They want to tell you what's right and wrong and make you think they've taught you everything." Chloe scoffs.

"So I should be bad from now on?" I ask confused.

"Not all the time, just sometimes. Just enough so they feel important." Chloe laughs and hands me another cookie.   
  


****************  
  


By the time I get to work the memory has faded and I'm immersed in tons of files.

I step out of my office and stretch. I've been cooped up all day answering the phone and doing paperwork. My secretary was sick this morning and thank god for Chloe, who I called and she agreed to come in today to help out with some of the kids. 

I walk over to the play room and I see her at the bottom of a pile of children. She's laughing and so are they. She just seems to make everyone she is around so happy. I walk into the room and clear my throat. "What is going on here?" I try to sound serious but I can't keep the humour from my voice.

"We're making a Chloe sandwich!" Justin screams. Chloe helps the kids to their feet and stands laughing as she tries to fix her hair. 

"Is that right?" I ask as I pick up Justin.

"Yep." He squeals as I tickle him. I put him back on the ground and direct him to the other kids where they're going to learn brail from a teacher the centre just hired. "I'll see you later Justin." I call, then turn to Chloe.

"Chloe thanks again for coming in on such short notice."

"Oh Brady, I should be thanking you for asking me to come in, I haven't had this much fun in years."

"No offense, but I think you need to get out more." I laugh.

"Brady Black, was that humour?" She asks tickling my side.

I laugh and she continues. "You think you're funny don't you?" 

"I do alright." I laugh as she continues to tickle my side. I try to move out of the way but end up flipping over a chair and crashing to the ground, taking Chloe with me.

"Ow, not so funny anymore is it?" I laugh and she joins me.

"No, I guess not." She admits and suddenly all the light humour is gone. Her hands are smoothing down my hair and I have no clue what to do. I feel like I'm sixteen again and as clueless as ever.

"I really have missed you." She says quietly and rests her head against my chest.

I smooth her hair from her face and kiss her cheek softly. "I feel the same way."

____

Are people still reading? 


	9. 9

  
  


I woke up early this morning; my nerves wouldn't allow me to get a deceit nights sleep and now Chloe is on her way. I check my hair in the mirror for probably the fifth time and I try to relax my shaking hands. I hear the doorbell and my heart begins to beat so fast I'm scared it might pop out of my chest. "Get it together!" I whisper to myself and take a deep breath before I open the door. 

"Chloe!?" I say and it comes out all wrong. Of course it's Chloe, who else was I expecting? She smiles at me and I feel my face flush. She looks stunning. In a simple daisy sun dress and sandals with her hair long and flowing down her back, she looks angelic. 

"You ready?" She asks me with a half smile that just seems so comforting. 

"Yeah. Let's go!" I grab my house keys and my wallet from the table and we're out the door. 

"You look good." She tells me as I climb into her convertible. 

"I do?" I ask and look at myself. I was only wearing faded jeans and a white button-down shirt and I couldn't imagine how she thought this was a good look. To be honest with myself, I didn't really have a sense of style.

"Yeah, it works for you." She laughs and I am sure it is at the look of shock on my face, so I smile back and I will the redness to go away.

"So where are we going?" I ask as we head out on the open road; destination unknown. 

"Well, I thought we could go for a little sightseeing." She tells me and her eyes are on me as she waits for my reaction. "What would you think about that?"

"I'd like that. I'd like it a lot actually." I watch her for a while and I wonder if she knows that I'm already sightseeing and I can't believe the view. 

"Ok then." She turns the dial on the radio and an old Tracy Chapman song comes on that we both love and she begins to sing along. I lean back real far in my chair, crossing my arms over my chest and lay my head on the back of the seat, just watching her. 

We head towards the country and it's a beautiful sight. The leaves on the trees are beginning to change. The brightest colours I have always dreamed of are laid out before me and I take them in like a starving man. The trees are so heavy, thick and untouched by the human hand, they bend from the sheer weight of the fat leaves on their limbs.

"What do you think?" Chloe asks as we pull in to a small parking lot beside a secluded pond.

"It's beautiful." I tell her and she smiles like she knew I was going to say that. 

"I love the way you smile." I say and don't even realize it came out of my mouth until it is too late. She's looking at me and I can't read her expression. She seems serious and then she breaks into a small laugh. 

"Philip always tells me that I smile too much. He says that I'm not a child and there is no reason for me to laugh and carry on the way I do. I think I embarrass him sometimes." She says cooly, turning her head. 

"I think Philip is wrong. In fact I know he is." I tell her. "Why do you let him put you down so much?" I ask hesitantly. 

She turns back to me and her eyes are soft. "Philip loves me, he just wants what's best for me, that's all."

"If you say so." I say and do my best to hide the jealousy and anger in my tone. I step out of the car and walk towards the pond.

I hear Chloe sigh and then get out of the car. "Brady wait!" 

"What?"

"Let's not talk about Philip today. Now get your ass over here and help me with this stuff." 

I smile despite myself and lend a helping hand. We unload the gear and set up under a tree. 

"I didn't take you for the fishing type." I tell Chloe as I watch my bobber in the clear water.

"It's relaxing." She says simply.

"Do you come here often?" I groan almost immediately after. If that doesn't sound like a cheesy pick-up line, what does? "I mean, why do you like this place so much."

"It's away from everything. When you're out here, it feels like you're the only person in the world."

I shrug my shoulders in confusion. "Why would you want to be alone?"

"I'm not alone, I have you here." She smiles and nudges my shoulder. I return her smile and I look her in the eye. She sits up and moves closer to me and I feel my breath catch in my throat. Her hand comes to the side of my face and she smooths it down my cheek. I inhaled deeply, this is it, we're going to kiss. A feel a jerk and then another and I look at my hands and then the spell is broken. 

"You've got a bite!" She cries excitedly and pulls my fishing rod up. Damn fish!

She helps me reel it in and we both laugh at the tiny fish on the end of my line. If I didn't know better I would say that Philip was even paying off the fish to ruin me and Chloe's time together, but the logical part of my brain told me that wasn't possible. 

"Hungry?" Chloe asks after she's reeled in her own line and put away the poles. 

I nod my head and she reaches for the picnic basket. We sit and eat sandwiches and tiny fruit tarts that Chloe baked herself.

"I don't believe it." I finally say.

"What?" Chloe asks with a worried expression on her face.

"You couldn't have made this food."

"Why not?" She asks with her hands on her hips.

"Because it's edible. I've had your cooking before and let me tell you it was awful, I was sick for a week." I laugh.

"You were not!"

"I was! I had to lay in bed for an entire day and my stomach felt like it was going to explode. Poor Belle threw up three times!" I laugh even more at the look of horror on Chloe's face.

"Brady Black, how dare you bring that up. That wasn't even my fault!" She laughs.

"Right!" I say and try to stifle my laughter. "No seriously, everything was really good today." I give her a wink and then my face flushes because I wonder where that little flirtatious move came from. 

Chloe seemed surprised too but her features relax and for the moment it does seem that it is only us in the world.


	10. 10

  
  


We pack up the garbage and the rest of the food we haven't eaten along with our fishing equipment and place them back in the trunk. Chloe gets her keys form her pocket and before I have time to react she throws them at me.

"What are these for?" I ask after I've picked them off the ground.

"You're driving!" She yells over her shoulder as she walks over to the passenger side and hops in. I stand there in shock and I don't know what to do. 

"I can't drive." I finally manage to get out.

"I know, that's why I'm going to teach you." Chloe says and gives me this face that makes me seem very foolish. 

I sit in the drivers seat bracing the wheel between my hands. "Okay, start her up." 

I fiddle with the ignition until I hear the roar of the engine and I'm quite proud of myself. 

"Great, now put it in reverse and give it a little gas."

I do as she says and I give it very little gas. I can just imagine eighty year old great grandmothers passing us as I switch gears and move forward. I'm cautious even though there is no one around for miles and Chloe keeps urging me to go faster. I press my foot on the gas and give the car a little jolt forward. "That's better, now keep that speed constant and the car straight." She encourages and I can just tell she is getting the biggest kick out of this.

"That's easy for you to say." I tell her and take a quick glance in her direction. "I've never driven before though and if a cop pulls us over we are in some serious shit." 

"Let me worry about that." She says lightly. "Now relax, you're doing great." 

I smile and keep my eyes trained on the road. I feel Chloe edge towards me and my heart begins to race. "What are you doing?"

Chloe says nothing and before I know what is happening she slams her foot over mine and floors the gas. The trees blur as we sped past them and my mind seems to go with them. We are racing fast and my pulse beats wickedly to try to keep up. "Chloe!?" I shout over the engine, but she ignores me and keeps my foot flush with the petal. "We're going to crash!" 

"No, we won't." She says and makes me feel silly at her childish tone. She grabs the wheel when I start to lose control and doesn't seem worried at all. I begin to relax a little, but just a little. "Just feel it Brady."

"Feel what?" I ask and I think maybe she has gone crazy. Maybe her time with Philip has finally drove her over the edge. 

"The wind, the trees, everything!" She laughs. Against my better judgement I take in the view and do so because I trust Chloe and would do anything to please her. 

For a moment I watch her. Her eyes are big and her smile is so bright, I wonder how Philip could think it was immature. Her hair is whipping over her shoulder and every so often grazes my face. She smells like fresh strawberries in the summer and I know it is wrong to have these feelings about her, but I can't help myself. I put my hands over hers and she smiles at me and my heart does that little flutter thing that never grows old with her. 

The first drops of rain, I think we both tried to ignore, but as the road became wetter and slick, we couldn't ignore it. Chloe removed her foot from the gas and the car slowed easily. "We'll have to pull over." She tells me and looks at me expectantly. 

I slow dramatically and the car lurches a bit. "Sorry." 

"It's okay. Just ease to the side of the road." She tells me as the droplets of rain start to grow heavy. "We'll have to put the top up." 

I nod my head and slowly bring the car to a stop. I turn off the ignition and we both run out, grasping the cover for the roof and pull it over to prevent the car from being soaked. The rain crashes down on us just as we're doing up the last strap. Running back into the safety of the car, we both huff and puff. We roll up the windows and sit there looking at each other for a minute before Chloe speaks. "I'm sorry I did that to you." She says apologetically.

"Did what?"

"Drove so fast like that. I know Philip would...and we're not supposed to talk about him." She says softly when she catches the annoyed look on my face. "I do that sometimes. It's like I can't drive fast enough. I just wanted you to feel it too."

"Thanks." I tell her and I can't help my fingers from tangling in her hair and brushing the wet strands from her face. "It was a rush."

She smiles shyly as I reassure her and it seems weird to see her less than confident. In all the years I had known her, she had always been the most independent, secure person I had met. But now this self-doubting troubled me. 

I inched closer to her softly wiping away the small drops of water that had fallen on her face. The windows were already fogging and the rain brought out a distant musty smell. Chloe takes my glasses off my face, folding the arms and resting them on the dash. Her fingers seek the curves and lines of my face and I melt into her touch. She looks into my eyes and I can't read the expression on her face. "I've really missed you." She says sadly and kisses my cheek. She pulls back and I ache to take her right now and make love to her with the rain surrounding us and our skin slick. Instead, I let her fall into my arms and hold her close while the thunder cracks and the lightning explores the sky all around us. 

The rain stops and when we finally notice, Chloe pulls the car out of park and we set back down the road. I can't tell for sure but I think we've taken a wrong turn. I guess my suspicions are right because we pull up to a small chapel and Chloe parks the car. I think she is looking for a map or something but she just sits there.

"What's going on?"

"This is where Philip and I are going to get married." She sighs and I know I'm making myself hear the tiny bit of sorrow in her voice. 

"It doesn't seem like Philip's style." I say bitterly. "I thought he would want something much more elaborate, not a small church surrounded in flowers and beauty."

"It's not. I choose this place. Philip got to invite whoever he wanted, have the reception wherever he wanted, just as long as the ceremony was here." 

"Why? Why here?" I ask.

"I dunno. I just always imagined we'd get married here." She shrugs and I have to wonder to myself weather she means her and Philip or her and me.


	11. 11

  
  


So I'm sitting at a table with Chloe and Philip and we're eating dinner, but surprisingly I don't have an appetite. In truth, I haven't felt like eating or doing anything since Philip came back from his business trip and has reclaimed Chloe.

I've decided I can no longer live my life without Chloe by my side.

I see my chance to tell her how I feel and damn the consequences when Philip gets up to go to the bar.

"I have to give you something." I tell her and she smiles shyly. God, I never thought I would see Chloe shy, and I wonder to myself how many times in our childhood was she shy and I didn't recognize it. "I know you have a boyfriend..."

"I'm..." She starts to remind me that she's engaged and I know very well that she is, so I cut her off.

"I mean engaged, but if I don't do this now, I will lose my nerve." I think it is the wine that is making me so brave as I get up from my seat and kneel in front of her, taking her heart-shaped face in my hands. God, her skin is so soft and I can't help but stall because I know in another minute Philip will be back and I will have to go back to my seat, watching them fawn all over each other. I look into her eyes, really look, because I'd never been able to before and I think I see love, but I snap out of it because I know I am just projecting my own feelings onto her. And so I move forward and let my lips descend on hers slowly; she tastes of wine and strawberries and God help me if I don't think that it is the best combination ever. I pull back and her eyes are still closed and send me to hell right now because I want to take her in my arms and make love to her right there. "Jesus, you're beautiful!" And it takes me a minute to realize that I've said it out loud and that Philip is on his way back to our table. 

Philip returns just as I ease my way back into the chair. I look across from me as he takes his seat and kisses Chloe's cheek. She doesn't even seem to notice or flinch when he touches her and I'm amazed because her gaze is on me. I don't know what to do, where to look, until finally Philip begins to talk and I am forced to look at him.

I'm mortified and I have to sit and watch Philip with MY Chloe. I really should have thought my plan through I realize.

After dinner, I skip desert and head back to the penthouse alone. 

Not an hour later as I'm lying in bed wearing my pajama bottoms and not much else, I hear a knock on the door.

I want to ignore it but the noise persists until I can't stand it anymore and I drag myself out of bed to answer it.

"What?" 

"Brady!?" Chloe says quietly and collapses in my arms.

"What's wrong? Sweetie, talk to me." I beg as she sobs against my bare chest.

"I'm sorry." She says softly.

"Sorry? What are you sorry for?" I am completely confused. Not an hour ago I thought I had ruined any chance I'd ever had to be with Chloe and now here she is on MY doorstep crying in MY arms.

"For everything. Philip and I...it's over. You were right. He doesn't listen to me. He doesn't care about me, about my dreams. I was only with him...it doesn't matter now. He used me Brade. There were always other girls. I knew. He knew, I knew and he never did anything. He didn't even feel guilty for Christ's sake."

"You deserve better." I say softly, walking her to the couch.

"Damn right I do. When I think of all the time I wasted with him...oh Brady why'd you have to go away?"

"I'm sorry, Chloe. I'm here now. I'm not going anywhere now." I say and I feel myself choke up because I know now that I'm partly responsible for Chloe's decision to be with Philip.

"I just thought he might be like you, you know. I mean you're related....I just thought I could replace you somehow, but I knew I was fooling myself. I know there is no one like you."

I have no words to go along with the plethora of emotions I'm feeling, so I stroke her hair and listen because I think that's what she really needs anyway. 

"And then when you kissed me tonight, I felt it. I felt it all come back. The way you used to make me feel, the way I wanted you to touch me. Could I stay here tonight Brade? With you?" She asks from hooded eyes and I swear I see desire there. This wasn't going to be like the sleep overs of our youth.  
  


*********************

"Mom, can Brady sleep over?"

"Oh Chloe, I don't know if that's such a good..."

"Please?" I beg after Chloe nudges me. That's all it took.

"Alright, let me give your mother a call and make sure it's alright with her."

"Okay." We said in unison. 

An hour later Chloe and I lay tucked in her small bed surrounded in G.I. Joe sheets and pillows. She takes my hand under the blankets and smiles at me. "You're my best friend in the whole world Brade, I hope we're always friends. And then one day when we're adults we can get married."

She turns from me and within a few minutes she is asleep. I think how wonderful it all sounds and fall asleep myself.  
  


***********  
  


My heart is beating so hard in my chest I feel the room spin. I think I need some oxygen and a cold shower, I realize.

I know I'll hate myself if I don't take this risk, so I lean forward and kiss her softly on the lips. She reacts instantly and suddenly she's pinned me down on the couch. We're both breathing hard and I'm almost afraid when she puts her full weight on me because I know now she can feel how much I want her.

Suddenly it's all going too fast for me and I realize she has just broken up with Philip not an hour ago. I don't want to be the rebound guy. 

"Chloe wait! I've never..." I begin, but lose my nerve and hope she knows what I'm trying to tell her.

"Never what?" She asks and tilts her head to the side. I can't help but notice how her lips have swelled from our kisses and how absolutely gorgeous she looks.

"Jesus Chloe, don't make me say it." I rake my fingers through my hair and I'm positive my face is practically glowing redder than Rudolph on Christmas eve.

"Say what?" Her breathing is shallow and her eyes flicker dangerously at me. 

I don't know how to make the words form in my throat and I know my eyes are begging for her to understand. "This...you...I've never..." I just can't get the words out and at this point, I'm so frustrated with myself, I have to turn my gaze form her. Her hand covers mine and I feel a tingle shoot through my body. 

"Tell me please." She touches my face softly and turns my head so I'm forced to look at her. I can see the concern and the tension, as if she's bracing herself for the worst. 

"I've never been....made love before." I tell her on a sigh, and immediately I divert my eyes because I have no idea how she'll react. She squeezes my hand for comfort and I don't know whether it's out of pity or what.

"Are you saying you're a virgin?" She asks and I think maybe she's making fun of me.

"Isn't that what I just said?" I ask and jerk my hand away from her. "Do you find this funny?" My voice is hard and I can't hide the pain when I think she may be mocking me.

"No, Brady. No." 

I feel relief yet uncomfortable in the silence as she continues to look at me.

"What?" I ask self consciously.

"I think it's beautiful." She shares and give me a small smile. "We're not ready for this." She finally says and takes a step back from me. 

"You don't want to be with me now because I've waited for you all this time? Now that you know you're the only one I could love enough to be with, you don't want me. Is that what you're saying?"

"Y-you waited...this was about me?"

I know I've blow it; told her too much. I can't take anything back and the way she's looking at me now is beginning to become unnerving. 

"Come on." She takes my hand and leads me to my bedroom. Slipping into bed, she pulls me with her and keeps my hand in hers. "Goodnight Brady." 

"Night." I say but I know it will be very hard to sleep with her beside me. She wraps her arm around me and settles her head on my chest. I know she's just about asleep. Squeezing my eyes tight, I quietly whisper in her ear. "I love you."

To my surprise she mumbles, "mmm...love you." 

I know it's wrong to trick it out of her but I'm grateful to hear it nonetheless. My heart is soaring and I have a funny feeling that for once in my life things are going to work out.


	12. The End Thanks for reading and replying ...

  
  


I have a bad feeling that when I wake up it will all have been a dream or that Chloe will have heard my omission and bolted at first light. But as I lazily come out of my sleep and put my glasses on I see that she is still beside me, snoring quietly. I easily slip out of bed and head for the shower. I've overslept and am late for work. 

  
  


As I come out of the shower, Chloe is sitting up in bed looking at me. I feel my face flush instantly. "Good Morning."

"Isn't it?" She says and laughs. "I haven't slept like that in years. I felt so safe last night."

"I'm glad." I tell her and avert my eyes to my closet to pick out some clothes. I cannot look at her if I expect to make it to work at all.

"Brady!?"

"Mmm hmm?" I mumble laying out gray slacks.

"Did you tell me you loved me last night?" She asks and there is no humour in her voice. 

"Chloe-I....Yes." I figure why lie. It was the reason I came back in the first place wasn't it? 

"Say it again." She whispers and I turn to look at her. I can't help notice the flush of her cheeks or the swell of her breasts accentuated by the ruffled pink button down, that has come undone at the first few buttons in her sleep.

She steps off the bed and comes closer, throwing the tie from my hand so she can take it. "Please, say it again."

"I-I love you, Chloe." And as if it is too much for her, she buries her face in my chest. "What is it?"

She sobers for a minute and stares up at me. "That's the first time someone other than Mom or Craig has told me that and really meant it."

"Philip?"

"No. He never meant it. Brady, I...even before you came back...God, even when we were in highschool...maybe when we were still kids...I-I've always loved you." She whispers against my cheek and kisses me softly. "I just never knew how to tell you."

I'm stunned. Frankly, I can't believe this is really happening. I hug her to me tightly and she responds with just as much force.

"Marry me?" I ask and I admit it isn't very romantic. 

She pulls away and looks at me. "What?"

I hold her shoulders and I can feel her trembling. "I know that's not the way it should have come out. You deserve more than that. Hang on." I let her go and fish for the box I brought with me in hopes of just this. I open it to make sure the ring is still there. Thankfully it is.

I smile sheepishly and kneel in front of her, only for Chloe to kneel down beside me. We're eye to eye on the small throw rug. "You don't know how long I've waited for this day. Mom-Marlena said she knew one day it would come down to this." I pull the ring from the box and take a deep breath. "This ring, it was my birth mother's, she died when I was just a baby, but dad kept her ring. He told me to give it to someone special and ever since I've had it, I've known it belonged to you. I even had it engraved." I smile and I can feel a deep blush on my cheeks and ears. "Chloe, would you marry me?"

"I've never wanted anything more." She says softly and helps my shaking hands put the ring on her finger. "What does it say?" She asks as she wipes the tears from her eyes.

We read it in unison. "You are my sight, Love Brade."

She grabs me and pulls me toward her, making us both aware that I'm still only in my towel. Her kiss is soft and tender against my lips. I know in my heart I'll never love anyone as much as I love her and I'm so thankful that she feels the same. My lips part to invite her tongue as it invades my mouth, I retaliate and get a wonderful taste of her. She's magnificent and for once I feel normal.

I pull away even though everything in me is saying not to, but I have an obligation to those kids at the blind centre. I can tell Chloe understands because she gives me some distance.

"Tonight..." She rasps. "I'll make dinner, here. Don't be late." She smiles.

"I won't." I take a few minutes to pull myself together and then I stand to get dressed. I hear Chloe in the shower and am tempted to stay.

At work I'm on edge all day. By the tone of Chloe's voice this morning, I know she has more on her mind than dinner. 

It's one of the happiest days of my life, but still I'm saddened because Justin's mother has come from Canada to take him back with her. I knew this day was coming but saying goodbye proved harder than I thought. I know he will do well in life and I plan to keep in contact with him.

Locking up for the night, I decide that before I go home, I'll pick up some flowers for Chloe.

Stepping out of the cab, I look up at the building I live in to the top floor, the penthouse. It's a nice feeling knowing that Chloe is there waiting and from now on will always be waiting. 

"Brady, is that you?" Chloe asks from the kitchen and I laugh at her enthusiasm. "I told Craig and Nancy about us and they didn't seem the least bit surprised."

I hesitate when she walks out of the kitchen. She's practically glowing and I feel my heart swell with pride. "You look amazing."

"I feel amazing." She replies and comes to me for a slow sweet hug. 

"Dinner smells good."

"So do you." She says and it comes out as a growl. At this rate I don't see us making it to dinner.

We eat with lingering stares and small touches passing before us.

After I help with the dishes, we sit on the couch together. I see the look she gets in her eyes and I excuse myself to use the bathroom. 

I look at myself in the mirror. I'm breathing hard, I know what Chloe wants, what I want, but I'm just not sure if I'll be enough for her.

"Brade!? Are you okay?"

I open the door and step out. "I'm fine, I'm just nervous. I want to give you so much, Chloe."

"You will." She purrs into my ear, leading me up the stairs.

Her hips shake in a hypnotic rhythm that has me losing my reserve fast. 

Laying down on the bed, we kiss and I know I'm clumsy but I feel safe as Chloe guides us along.

She takes my shirt off and the chill of the air hits me hard, but I warm as I watch her touch my shoulders, sending sparks down my spine.

She kisses me hard and I respond as best as I can, naturally wanting more of her. She leaves me wanting as she trails her lips and tongue over my jaw and down my collarbone.

Her lips are soft as they still over my chest, at the very spot where my heart is beating fiercely looking for a route to escape. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared. I am. I'd never had this type of uncontrollable impulses and unchecked desire that I seemed to be experiencing in all my life. 

  
  


She brings my hand against her straining breast. The desire sparks in her eyes and she pushes her body heavy against my hand, forcing my fingers over the peak of her nipple. Her skin is warm and I can feel the radiant heat even through the thick fabric of her sweater. I look at her as I bring the fabric over her head with her approval. She presses against me and I feel all my blood rush to my groin. I let her take off the rest of my clothing and I do the same for her, stilling to take in her beauty.

"You're shaking." Chloe whispers against my ear.

"I'm sorry, I can't help it." I tell her and I can't. I can't stop the tremble that is coursing through my body from my head down to my toes. There is no stopping the way I react to her. I guess it is a mixture of nerves and anticipation and that surreal euphoria of actually being with her in this way.

She flips over so she is on her back and pulls me down to her, taking another deep kiss from my mouth. Her hips buck against me and I curse softly. She laughs against my ear and brings me even closer to her. Our bodies are so close, closer than I've been with anyone my whole life and I shake a little harder at the thought of being with her like this for the rest of our lives. She takes me in her hand and my body jerks in response, I want nothing more than to slip inside her, but I wait for her to sheath my erection in a condom before I move forward and she takes me inside. I still immediately and I can't breath. I rest my forehead against hers and can't help the tear that trickles onto her brow. "You're okay. You're doing fine." She reassures me and begins to move underneath me, taking my hand and placing it against her womanly form. I move in her and am overwhelmed at the sheer intensity of it. 

  
  


Later as we lay together, she smooths her fingers through my hair and I run my fingers down her back. "That little church was never meant for Philip was it?"

"Of course not." She says, pushing her hair out of her face. "I've only ever loved you and that's the way it will stay."

"Then let's not wait. Let's get married as soon as possible." 

"I would love that." She sighs and squeezes my side. 

___

We're standing outside the small church that Chloe picked long before she met Philip and we're married. I can't believe it myself and the way she looks I know it will last forever. There are some things that are too good to dream and others worth waiting for. This was definitely one of those things for me. 


End file.
